Do you know what a husband stitch is?… is when repairing episiotomies or tearing from birth, some providers put in an extra stitch “for daddy,” with painful consequences for women.

This practice is truly happening and new parents are not being informed about the consequences, they’re not informed about the risk involved.
The husband stitch is actually breaking down relationships due to the fact that the stitch is causing such pain, women are becoming scared to have intercourse with their partners and their partners are feeling push out due to not being able to continue their sexual relationship they had before their baby was born.

I think it’s time we remind our practitioners that we do not need and we do not want a husband stitch, we just want to repair our perineum back to how it was, if it’s a 2 degree tear which needs stitching, then stitch a 2 degree tear with no extra stitches, thank you very much.   The husband stitch actually reminds me of the FGM – Type 3 (narrowing of the vaginal opening by creating a seal, which is illegal in the UK), not the same but not far from it.

It’s your body, it’s your choice, if you have to, raise your voice, because you matter! 

Read husband stitch article here.

How to minimise perineal trauma:

• Perineum massage – in the later stages of pregnancy you can massage your perineum.  Massaging this area can improve elasticity and reduce the chances of tearing or episiotomy.

• Gentle exerscise and healthy balanced diet – can improve your blood circulation and keep your skin healthy.  You will have more energy for birth, and your skin elasticity will improve.

•  Pelvic floor/kegel exercise – in pregnancy it’s important to learn how to control these muscles, how to tighten and how to relax them.  Relaxing the muscles during the pushing stage of labor can help prevent a tear.

• Instincts – listen to your body and follow your body’s instincts when birthing your baby.  Some practitioners like to instruct pushing which can put you at greater risk of tearing, it is good to have support and encouragement when birthing, but you know what feels right for your body.

• Water birth – promotes relaxation, and conserves mother’s energy, which contributes to reduced perineal trauma and can eliminate the need for episiotomies.

• Birthing position – lying on your back, lying down with your legs held up, or semi-reclining positions reduce the size of the pelvic floor and increases the chances of you tearing.   Different birthing positions to try:  All fours (hands and knees), Lunging, Side-lying (with peanut-shaped birthing ball  between legs), Squatting (over a chair, birthing ball, birthing stool, with back against a wall) to name a few.  You know what position is best for you, listen to your body.

• Warm compression – a warm flannel or compress held to the perineum during the crowning stage, can reduce severe tearing. The warmth from the compress increases the blood flow to the area and can help to relieve burning sensation.

• Controlled breathing techniques – can be better than pushing out your baby, it is better for mother and child.  You don’t have to push with your whole body while holding your breath in to birth your baby.  This reduces oxygen to you and your baby, and tenses your muscles instead of relaxing them.  When you feel the urge to push, this is actually your uterus already contracting and pushing your baby down.

• Birthing place – the place of birth may affect how relaxed you are, or the position you birth your baby in.

• Care provider – you can consider asking your care provider their rates of tears or episiotomies.

How does one take care of their vagina, their womb, their yoni after birth?

Have you heard about yoni steaming and the countless healthy benefits for you.  There’s no need to stitch things tighter as yoni steaming is known to help with healing, can make your vagina become tighter naturally and more.
Read my blog on yoni steaming and see if this is something you what to implement into your life.